Krishnamurti was asked the following question: "We know sex as an inescapable physical and psychological necessity and it seems to be a root-cause of chaos in the personal life of our generation.  How can we deal with this problem?

Here is how i answered the same question:

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Okay, with this one i know we must go straight to the old "trusty" so that we both agree on what it is that we are talking about when we mention the word sex.  Here is how the "trusty" defines sex: (1) sexual activity, including specifically sexual intercourse; and (2) either of the two main categories (male and female) into which humans and most other living things are divided on the basis of their reproductive functions.

With that as our foundation, let's say that the "sex" that you are talking about falls under definition 1 rather than under definition 2.  The trouble with definitions sometimes it must be a "general definition" and not a "specific definition".  What i mean is this: there are all kinds of sex that qualifies for "sexual intercourse".  There is actually "good" sex and "bad" sex, and the two never meet in the same place.

Sex, by itself, is not a problem within the human community.  It's when we treat "sex" casually and without the respect that it is due when sex becomes a problem.  Sex promulgates the species.  What in the world is wrong with that?  Creatures were given sexual organs for that specific purpose.  All creatures have sex for goodness sake.  Why would you say that it is the root cause of chaos within our lives?

Is it because our hormonial glands create an atmosphere such that the mind cannot compete?  Is that it?  Is the hormonal drive for sex so great that one cannot get past the onslaught from our glands that no one has any other alternative than to turn the mind over to the glands?  Are the glands that strong?

I think not.  Most of us discover early in our lives things about our body that we don't usually talk about with other people.  Just like everything that we first encounter, we analyze it for pleasure and pain.  And guess what?  When our younger selves were exploring their bodies, they discovered "pleasure" like no pleasure they had experienced before.  They call this discovery a "climax", the most exciting or important point of something, especially in a story or movie. It can also refer to the highest point of sexual pleasure. 

Based upon the definitional evidence, it is difficult to see how "sex" could be a problem.  Unless, of course, you come to the realization that "pleasure" does not necessarily correlate to "Goodness".  Sex can be misused.  Sex can hurt people.  Sex can be used as a weapon against the fragility of the human psyche.

But we all know that.  We all know what we are dealing with when we are talking about "sex".  Sex should be a loving, giving act; not something that is purely self-rewarding.  Believe it or not, self-rewards don't add to your resume.  In fact, many times self-rewards actually detract from your testimony.  It's just one of those "humbling" things that we have to deal with.

Sex is meant to between two "consenting adults" who are in "spiritual tune" with each other.  Sex outside of these parameters tends to be the type that causes problems.  So, my advice when it comes to sex is this.  If you want to have sex without a problem, find yourself another consenting adult (soul mate) that is willing to give of themselves for you and for which you are willing to give yourself to them.

Loving, meaningful sex is not a problem unless it is hurtful.  And hurtfulness is in the eye of the beholder, and not in the act of sex, itself.

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Personally, i think we make a bigger deal about sex than we should and that is half of our problem.  Yes, sex promulgates the species, and it is required, but most "sexual activity" by human beings does not procreate.  Most sex carries on with little sense of promulgating the species, so we cannot justify it solely based upon that premise.  

Sex provides "pleasure like we cannot get anywhere else" even if it is only "for a short burst of time".  It's that "unparalleled pleasure" that causes us our problems.  We like that pleasure.  We want that pleasure.  We would like our entire lives to be "pleasurable" like that, so we seek those kind of experiences out again and again.  Sometimes people actually kill for those experiences.  And that is a problem!

Sex is not the answer to "heaven on Earth".  No sirree, bob!  Sex was made pleasurable so that our species would pro-create.  Without procreation there is no continuity to the future.  And if there is no continuity to the future, it doesn't really matter what you think about now because it will be meaningless tomorrow.  It's like the body created itself in such a way that it could live on even if it meant within another being or soul.  Without sex, there is no tomorrow.  Get over it.

Now, we all know that sex can be bad and that indeed can be a problem.  Well, just stop it, i say.  Stop having bad sex and making problems for yourself.  It's not too difficult to understand the difference between "loving, caring, intimate sex" and "sex all by its lonesome".  You understand the differences, so in other words, sex should not be a problem for you.  If it is, then seek help from a counselor.

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Sex should be an act of "giving", not "taking".  It's when we get this reversed that sex is bad.  Taking is counter to Giving and "giving of yourself" is what enlightenment, the Buddha/Jesus/Mohammad mind, cosmos consciousness is all about.

This works with everything in life: giving is better than taking, and right action is better than no action, making Giving the most important thing you can do with one's life.  And what could be greater than giving yourself (your entire mind, body, and soul) to a soulmate?  That's the question you must ask yourself, when you say that sex is responsible for all the "chaos" in the world.

Without sex, the world would cease to turn.

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Now i would like to take a little time to talk about Krishnamurti's response to the same question.  Krishnamurti said that the "mind is sensation" (i like that phraseology) and he says it's the mind that is the problem, not sex.  I agree wholeheartedly.  There is no inherent badness associated with sex.  The mind is the battlefront for sex and it is the mind that establishes the "rules of war".  The "rules of war" for sex are not written by the Almighty, but instead in your own mind, and it represents a "single view" on the subject.  Others have different views.

So, in other words, any problem that you are having with sex is more and likely coming from your mind, not your inner being, your soul.  Think on that for a second.

Krishnamurti somewhat mocks chastity, and i agree with him on that.  Chastity from sex doesn't buy you anything.  There is nothing necessarily wrong with chastity; it's just the fact that you should not consider "chastity" as a path on the Road to Enlightenment.

And finally, i noticed the Krishnamurti used the term "ambition" in his response a couple of times.  Ambition is another of those words that pops up quite a bit in the "spiritual literature".  And "ambition" is always treated as something "unseeming" rather than "good"   I am just throwing that out there for the moment, but you should keep this in your mind. 

Ambition, like bad sex, is bad regardless of the form it takes. 

ps.  And sometimes sex is used for ambitous purposes, and ambition is used for sexual purposes.   Go figure.